One of the problems with writing something other humans will ready every day for 30 days is it makes one feel even more self-centred than one already assumed one was.
One might, for example, have insomnia of a Sunday night, because one was obsessing over ridiculous ideas and worries which one is too ashamed to list here but which may or may not include:
where to live
how to earn more money
why one is not able to sleep
whether this insomnia is because of perimenopause
what other havoc perimenopause will wreak
whether one is still physically desirable anymore
how self-centred all these thoughts are
and what the fuck one is going to write about tomorrow.
One might then slodge through the following day with marshmallows for brains, trying to work and not fall asleep, and then wake up in the middle of the night again, thinking all these thoughts again plus change.
One might thus check one’s phone (which one tries very hard not to do until after meditating in the morning - fat a lot of good that’s doing) and learn that someone very dear to her has had a stroke and is in the hospital.
Christ.
So for today, I have nothing. Maybe just a reminder of the statistic that 95% of the thoughts we have today will be the same as we had yesterday, and maybe to go and hug the people you love, and even tell them, to quote Ted Lasso, that you appreciate them.
We’ve moved to a new part of town and here are some photos I took to accompany what I didn’t know what to write about today.
PS: I appreciate you.
Thanks for sharing your difficult times. You are not alone. Love the photos especially the gate. Love the detail. Hope your friend recovers.
You’re on such a magical place! Wow. And having the same thoughts most of us, I suspect have, most of the time except when interrupted by emergency or necessity or joy. I’m buying lottery tickets for joy…
Love your posts: I say this not to give you superfluous strokes but in appreciation— each piece feels like a small win on those lottery tickets of joy. Thank-you!