I met Jasmine when I came to Fethiye in 2015. She had arrived as a refugee from Syria months before, pregnant with her son and with her 2-year old daughter in tow, who the soldiers tried to take away from here as they crossed the border by foot.
The soldiers did not succeed.
We became friends that year, and since then I’ve watched her family start a business, find a better home, and become part of the community in Fethiye as best they can. Since I moved here, her two parents, sister, husband and two kids have helped me move into my home (and break into my home when I got locked out); brought me blankets, rugs and falafel; loved me; fed me; invited me to family events and treated me like one of their own.
Jasmine is one of the busiest people I know, but she still visits as many other refugee families as she can in her run-down beater of car ("Flash"), bringing them donated clothes, food, heaters, and whatever else the expat community in Fethiye donates. As one of the few refugees in Fethiye who speaks English, she's created a strong community web between the families and the Anglophone population.
In December, I joined her to buy some groceries for some families who live in the Syrian area, with money someone had donated. We brought two women to the local supermarket and helped them each pick out about $100 worth of food. We drove one of them, Amina, back home. I learned that Amina is a 44-year old widow whose husband died in jain in Syria, and that she is currently raising 5 children (the rest have left home), 4 of whom are hers and one of whom is her granddaughter. Their house had very little furniture and the kids were gleeful for the food and the donated clothes, and giggled away at all Jasmine's jokes (she was a primary school teacher in Syria and is amazing with kids). Amina was so thankful that she gave us each a huge container of olives - literally too many for me to eat on my own.
Turkey gives itself a lot of hype for the hospitality it's extended to refugees, but what doesn’t make the news (along with many other injustices) is how few rights these people have while they're living here. Plainly put, the majority of Turkish people are intensely racist against Arabs, and so are Turkish laws. Amina's kids and granddaughter haven’t been allowed to go to school because her employers (farmers) can't give her the right documents, so they stay home alone while she picks fruits and vegetables from about 8 am to 7:30 at night.
I can't tell you how many times a Turkish person has asked, upon seeing me with Jasmine or her sister, "Where is your friend from?" Or, "Is your friend Turkish?" Implying, of course, "What are you doing hanging around with an Arab?" The network that a few foreigners set up here in 2015 to help the refugees has had to go underground, because Jasmine could get into serious trouble for the work she does.
After seeing how far $100 went in both food and joy for Amina's family, I asked Jasmine what else they needed. She was quick to reply: "A vacuum." I get why - with concrete floors covered in rugs, and with 6 people living there, it would be a huge task to clean.
I decided to do a “love flash mob” and ask my friends to donate $5 towards a vacuum for Amina, which would have cost roughy $75. But because love wins, and because people are good, we ended up with… $1300.
This was close to Christmas. And so, with my heart having grown 3 sizes, I thought, what can we do with all this money?
And thus, Jasmine and Natalie’s Underground School for Syrian Kids was born.
Every week, twice a week, Jasmine and another young Syrian women went to Amina’s house and taught her kids basic English, Turkish, math and written Arabic. The idea was to bring the kids up to speed with their education so that when they were admitted to school, they wouldn’t be so far behind. It was also to give Jasmine some much-needed extra income, as her family’s business is struggling with so many expats not in Fethiye this year. With a total of $1650 raised once I put the word out about the school, we were able to run it for about 12 weeks, and buy some warm winter clothes for kids in 3 families.
And the vacuum cleaner.
As I was leaving to Istanbul at the beginning of February, we got amazing news: the kids were going to be allowed into school in March, AND Jasmine had gotten a full-time job. It felt like the tides had turned.
But a new law has just been passed: Turkey is no longer allowing asylum-seekers already inside Turkey to move to any province where they already form 25% of the population. This is in response to the anti-immigrant sentiment that’s been rising ahead of national elections next year.
Which of course, is only encouraging that sentiment. To that point: Amina’s landlord now refuses to give her a receipt for their rent to show that she officially lives in her home, because he doesn’t want to pay taxes. Which means her kids still can’t get into school. Determined to get them an education, she is looking to move, but housing prices are soaring here and she is worried she isn’t going to find anything that she can afford, with an honest enough landlord to give her proof of residency.
Months ago, I asked Jasmine if she would ever move back to Syria. She said no, adamantly. She explained that since the war, many Syrians have had to fight so hard to survive that they have lost their sense of humanity. This is evident even in the Syrian area of Fethiye, where there is endless backstabbing, gossiping and theft. Jasmine is extra careful that the donated goods go to families who really need them and who won't sell them for profit, or get into situations where they are stolen. But now, with all this hate, it’s getting worse. Case in point: a Syrian woman came into Amina’s home a few days ago while she was at work, while the kids were home, and stole things from her house, including firewood.
This is what happens when a country and its people lose everything.
Jasmine called me just now to share all this with me. (She also shared that the start date for her job has been delayed. I can only hope this is true and not further hate-mongering.) We decided that rather than ask for more donations right now now, we will wait until Amina has found a place with an honest landlord. But I wanted to share this update anyway. One positive thing about Turkey is that our dollars go a long way here. For example, Amina’s rent right now is about $80/month. She’ll be looking at more like $120 now that prices have gone up, which will come to approximately $170 with heating and fuel.
It makes me sick and crazed that this is happening, that the Turkish government has brainwashed its people this way, that the Syrians have this lot to bear on top of everything else, and that there is so fucking little I can do about it.
But little is not nothing. Our little school changed at least 7 lives. Those kids learned that they mattered, and they learned a lot of stuff, and Amina didn’t feel so alone. I want to continue to try to help this family, if nothing else.
I obviously can’t give tax receipts. And I also want to say, again, that I big time understand that there are a million places that desperately need support, and that we all only have limited resources. If you are not able to give, I 150% understand. But if you’re interested in donating down the line, and I MEAN it when I say $5 goes a long way here, please drop me a line and I may come back to you by the time this 30-day challenge is over.
If you want to see photos and videos of our little school and Jasmine and the kids, I have them in a google drive that I would be elated to share with you..
If you’ve read this far, I know your heart is probably breaking. And you probably feel as helpless as I do. But please remember that all we can do, any of us, is small things with great love.
Small things add up. And love still wins.
Such sadness. Yes I will help.
Count me in - I am very happy to donate some money to help. Let me know how.